So it's been months since I've written anything...I've come up with plenty of excuses. I am to busy, intimidated(yes, really), and frustrated...I have felt suffocated, claustrophobic, lazy...and finally, cranky.
Cranky. When we moved back in February I was excited about the fresh start...a new place...new people. Admittingly, things were a bit more difficult then I had anticipated. Ella had a rough time adjusting. When you are surrounded by little children one minute and then a large forest with a cell tower in the next, well, it can be a bit intimidating.
My business needed a huge boost. I had just built it up only to start over again. It was tough, but I was doing it!
Then Erich was injured in an elevator accident. His leg was crushed when the elevator suddenly dropped while he was getting on. It has been over 3 1/2 months and he is still dealing with an open wound...just now starting to walk on it.
I have been treading water. Sometimes I feel like I am being dragged under with no chance for a breath of air. I am going to let you in on a little secret...I am a control freak...a major planner. I know God is in control..I believe and trust in that with my whole heart and soul, but my sinful nature...my natural tendency to want a say in everything...always seems to creep up and take control. It makes me crazy.
SO. I have decided that this particular blog was meant to be somewhat therapeutic, a purging of sorts...spewing things on the page just so I can get words on the screen again...just to begin again...
Tuesday, October 20, 2009
Friday, January 9, 2009
Decisions, Decisions....
I am decisioned out...Do I go get myself another cup of coffee, or do I write? Should I be cleaning up the house before the realtor comes over, or do I write? What will Erich's decision be...stay or go? I guess I've just made the decision to not make decisions at all right now...I am going to write...after I get my cup of coffee.
Erich is holding a Divine Call to be Pastor of St. James Lutheran Church in North Branch, Michigan. YES! Michigan! This is the Welcome sign that we pass under crossing over the border from Indiana to Michigan, and it pretty much sum up how I feel about that state. I love it. The people are warm and welcoming, the scenery is nice to look at (especially in the Mackinac area), and most importantly--I have family and friends there. I spent summers at my grandparents' house in Bay City, went to High School at Michigan Lutheran Seminary in Saginaw, and taught in Chesaning for 3 years! To say that I have strong ties to that place would be a complete and utter understatement...BUT...the decision is not mine to make.
Erich needs to make this decision based on which congregation he feels needs his ministerial gifts the most. He is the Youth Pastor here...they need someone to start a Youth Program there. He loves visiting the Shut-ins here...they need someone who loves giving spiritual counsel to the elderly. St. James would like to focus on outreach...here at Christ, Erich heads up the outreach committee...clearly, he would be doing much of the same things, with the exception that he would be doing them alone, whereas at Christ, there is another Pastor.
I believe that God called Erich here for many reasons, some of which we will never know. But one of them was to help Erich get back on track. After his year of cancer treatments, Erich was extremely weak and exhausted....it took him his first full year hear to recover. Being one of two Pastors made it just that much easier to recouperate.
But now...I believe Erich needs to spread his wings. He has been given such a wonderful gift in that he has been cancer free for almost 5 years...a miracle. He needs to see what he is capable of...
Whatever Erich decides, I will support him. I am proud of him for the man that he has become and for the humble way in which he serves God's people.
Erich is holding a Divine Call to be Pastor of St. James Lutheran Church in North Branch, Michigan. YES! Michigan! This is the Welcome sign that we pass under crossing over the border from Indiana to Michigan, and it pretty much sum up how I feel about that state. I love it. The people are warm and welcoming, the scenery is nice to look at (especially in the Mackinac area), and most importantly--I have family and friends there. I spent summers at my grandparents' house in Bay City, went to High School at Michigan Lutheran Seminary in Saginaw, and taught in Chesaning for 3 years! To say that I have strong ties to that place would be a complete and utter understatement...BUT...the decision is not mine to make.
Erich needs to make this decision based on which congregation he feels needs his ministerial gifts the most. He is the Youth Pastor here...they need someone to start a Youth Program there. He loves visiting the Shut-ins here...they need someone who loves giving spiritual counsel to the elderly. St. James would like to focus on outreach...here at Christ, Erich heads up the outreach committee...clearly, he would be doing much of the same things, with the exception that he would be doing them alone, whereas at Christ, there is another Pastor.
I believe that God called Erich here for many reasons, some of which we will never know. But one of them was to help Erich get back on track. After his year of cancer treatments, Erich was extremely weak and exhausted....it took him his first full year hear to recover. Being one of two Pastors made it just that much easier to recouperate.
But now...I believe Erich needs to spread his wings. He has been given such a wonderful gift in that he has been cancer free for almost 5 years...a miracle. He needs to see what he is capable of...
Whatever Erich decides, I will support him. I am proud of him for the man that he has become and for the humble way in which he serves God's people.
Thursday, December 25, 2008
Merry Christmas!
I was enjoying the peace and quiet of Christmas Eve, reading a book and listening to the Yule Log on t.v., when I heard a little sneeze. Being the night owl that I am, 1 in the morning isn't a big stretch for me. But I didn't know how Erich would feel about opening presents from Santa that early--especially when he preached the next morning, so I put Ella back to bed.
Ella doesn't quite have the this whole Santa concept down. When I told her we should go downstairs to see what he brought her, she got excited--but not about presents. We got to the bottom of the stairs and she wanted to get her shoes on. Ella thought we were going to go and visit Santa.
Opening presents this year was amusing and so much more fun than the last two years. We...oops...Santa, brought Ella a few things, the first being an artist's desk with paper, markers, paint, glitter etc. She immediately sat down to draw. After a few moments had past we told her to open the other presents Santa had brought to which she responded, "in a second ok?" So we waited 'a second' and than asked her again if she wanted to open presents... her response? "In a bit." Never in my life have I heard of parents having to beg there children to rip open the presents Santa brought. There is a first time for everything.
The look on Ella's face was priceless whenever she opened a gift. Her mouth would form the perfect "O" and her big blue eyes would open wide. She would say, "Oh wow!" or "Oh my goodness!"
Now she is telling me that it's time to get dressed, which normally would be, well, normal. But today she is going to wear the very same dress I wore on Christmas Day 30 years ago. I can't wait to take the pictures!
Ella doesn't quite have the this whole Santa concept down. When I told her we should go downstairs to see what he brought her, she got excited--but not about presents. We got to the bottom of the stairs and she wanted to get her shoes on. Ella thought we were going to go and visit Santa.
Opening presents this year was amusing and so much more fun than the last two years. We...oops...Santa, brought Ella a few things, the first being an artist's desk with paper, markers, paint, glitter etc. She immediately sat down to draw. After a few moments had past we told her to open the other presents Santa had brought to which she responded, "in a second ok?" So we waited 'a second' and than asked her again if she wanted to open presents... her response? "In a bit." Never in my life have I heard of parents having to beg there children to rip open the presents Santa brought. There is a first time for everything.
The look on Ella's face was priceless whenever she opened a gift. Her mouth would form the perfect "O" and her big blue eyes would open wide. She would say, "Oh wow!" or "Oh my goodness!"
Now she is telling me that it's time to get dressed, which normally would be, well, normal. But today she is going to wear the very same dress I wore on Christmas Day 30 years ago. I can't wait to take the pictures!
Wednesday, December 24, 2008
Christmas Past
It's Christmas Eve day and I am thinking about what my family will be doing tonight...it makes me think of Christmas's past and all of the wonderful memories we made. One particular memory stands out.
Every Christmas Eve my siblings and I participated in a children's service at our church. There were always two, and my parents would always go to the first one. We could not wait until our dad picked us up from the last service, because we just knew he had a surprise for us.
We would jump into the car and ask, "So were we good this year, did you see Santa on your way here?" Somehow, when my dad was on his way to pick us up from church, he would be stopped by Santa, who would tell my dad in his jolly old way, "Steve, your kids have been particularly good this year, so I wanted you to give them an extra surprise." What a treat it was to be given chocolate donuts by Santa!
I have such clear memories of being bundled up in the back seat of the car looking up into the night sky, hoping for a glimpse of Santa and his reindeer. Of course my dad would encourage that by saying, "Look! There he is...see over there!" It was probably a cluster of stars or our vivid imaginations, but there were times when I thought I actually saw him.
This tradition never got old or any less magical as the years went on, even after the truth about Santa was known. It was even more fun to 'be in on it' as my younger brothers grew to look forward to dad's "visit" with Santa.
Every Christmas Eve my siblings and I participated in a children's service at our church. There were always two, and my parents would always go to the first one. We could not wait until our dad picked us up from the last service, because we just knew he had a surprise for us.
We would jump into the car and ask, "So were we good this year, did you see Santa on your way here?" Somehow, when my dad was on his way to pick us up from church, he would be stopped by Santa, who would tell my dad in his jolly old way, "Steve, your kids have been particularly good this year, so I wanted you to give them an extra surprise." What a treat it was to be given chocolate donuts by Santa!
I have such clear memories of being bundled up in the back seat of the car looking up into the night sky, hoping for a glimpse of Santa and his reindeer. Of course my dad would encourage that by saying, "Look! There he is...see over there!" It was probably a cluster of stars or our vivid imaginations, but there were times when I thought I actually saw him.
This tradition never got old or any less magical as the years went on, even after the truth about Santa was known. It was even more fun to 'be in on it' as my younger brothers grew to look forward to dad's "visit" with Santa.
Monday, December 22, 2008
A First Time for Everything
I never thought I would blog. What is blogging anyway? Who came up with that rediculous word? It doesn't really matter, because he/she is probably making lots of money because of it. I guess I decided to blog because I love to write and for some reason, sitting down with pen and paper intimidates me, so I thought this might be a good place to start.
It's COLD outside right now...all I want to do is drink coffee and watch Christmas Movies....funnily enough, I've been trying to get through the Lord of the Rings Trilogy...you may be wondering how those movies would fit into the Christmas theme...well, first of all, the setting of the movies is dark, cold, and snowy....so it gives me that cozy up on the couch feeling. Secondly, it is safe to say that my entire family are movie fanatics, and everytime we get together we watch some cult classic...Goonies...Willow...A Christmas Story...maybe even Lord of the Rings. Since I won't be seeing them this Christmas Season, in some way, it makes me feel closer to them. I know at some point, they will be watching movies too.
It's COLD outside right now...all I want to do is drink coffee and watch Christmas Movies....funnily enough, I've been trying to get through the Lord of the Rings Trilogy...you may be wondering how those movies would fit into the Christmas theme...well, first of all, the setting of the movies is dark, cold, and snowy....so it gives me that cozy up on the couch feeling. Secondly, it is safe to say that my entire family are movie fanatics, and everytime we get together we watch some cult classic...Goonies...Willow...A Christmas Story...maybe even Lord of the Rings. Since I won't be seeing them this Christmas Season, in some way, it makes me feel closer to them. I know at some point, they will be watching movies too.
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